


Sie Kennen Mich

by operahousehomicide



Category: 19th Century CE RPF, Elisabeth - Levay/Kunze
Genre: Animal Death, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Happy (Questionable) Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Suicidal Ideation, Suicide, relationship dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-04 21:17:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12176742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/operahousehomicide/pseuds/operahousehomicide
Summary: In which Der Tod has spent years trying to convince himself that Crown Prince Rudolf is a passing fancy, and Rudolf finds within Tod much more than the dark, promised friend of his youth.





	Sie Kennen Mich

**Author's Note:**

> I have nothing to say except I love Crown Prince Rudolf

Der Tod becomes aware of Rudolf’s existence only mere seconds after the boy’s own mother does. She has not bled in weeks, and now, familiarly ill in the quiet hours of the early morning, she knows. He can feel her upset from where he attends to another soul elsewhere in the mortal realm. She can think only of her little Sophie, the Archduchess, and how Tod cut such an imposing figure against the fading Budapest light that streamed through the windows of the royal apartments. In her mind’s eye, the Empress cannot recall anything but the scorching fever-heat of her daughter, and how it contrasted so terribly with Tod’s corpse-cold hands as he laid a grounding hand upon her wrist, steadying her for his own benefit. Elisabeth can see nothing but the expressionless look upon Tod’s face as he leaned close to her busom and kissed the life out of her darling child. She does not want another. Tod decides then and there that he will take great interest in the child’s life.

-

Tod is there when over the next few days, Elisabeth does not eat, and spends many hours in the saddle, riding like she has become even madder than she is already rumored to be. It appears although she is running from something. She spits upon the ground at his feet when she limps past where he is lounging against a structural column and into the stables, but Tod hears what she has to say as clearly if she had spoken it. _If you shall take this one, too, it will be on my terms_. The baby does not naturally abort, and Elisabeth is too vain to take the concoction of tansy oil and rue, as she knows the young women of the court who are afflicted with unwanted pregnancies, who miraculously miscarry, oftentimes lose their hair. She bars Franz-Josef from their washroom that evening and shrieks herself hoarse, pounding upon the tile floor until her knuckles are bloody. Tod lets her alone for the remainder of her pregnancy.

-

The first time Tod meets Rudolf is just after he has taken his first breath of air. The Crown Prince is nothing but a pink, squirming, wailing thing, born of a woman who bears no love for him. The Empress will not look at her son, and by the time the one-hundred and one gun salute sings beyond the palace walls, little Rudolf has curled his entire fist around Tod’s cold pinky. The touch of the infant feels like coal-hot ash has been ground into Tod’s skin. Death looks Elisabeth in the eyes and kisses the Crown Prince upon the cheek, just at the corner of his spit-slick little mouth, chaste and promising, before absconding.

-

Der Tod has always been, if nothing else, remarkably patient. Although he never shows himself to her, he becomes a silent companion to Rudolf’s nurserymaid, a woman who the child calls _Wowo_. Tod tunes himself in to the cry of the babe for his nurse, and oftentimes, _Wowo_ does not come to comfort the boy, for his cries have already ceased at the icy caress of Tod’s hand upon his crinkled brow. On better days, when Rudolf has peace, and Tod comes only to cast a cursory glance over him in the witching hours, as he sleeps, Death finds the prince has found comfort in wrapping a little fist around the cool metal bar of his crib in a sad imitation of Tod’s hand. Tod gently tucks one hem of the blanket with which he sleeps under Rudolf’s elbow, bidding him a silent goodnight. Although a patient being by design, Tod finds himself drawn to the child. He is present more frequently throughout the boy’s childhood than Sisi is.

-

Tod is present when Rudolf nearly dies first of a terrible concussion after falling a considerable distance from a ladder during some endeavor to climb a tree, then later when he becomes sick with typhoid. Sisi does not come to her boy. Tod holds the child in his arms and murmurs sweet promises to him. The cold of his skin gentles Rudolf’s fever. Eyes watery and rimmed in red, voice rasping and weak from the harsh coughs that rattle his lungs, his hair slicked back with sweat, Rudolf begs his friend to take him away for the first time. Tod’s chest tightens peculiarly. As much as he would love to whisk the child away from all that ails him, it is not his time. The little prince is sickly for the rest of his childhood.

-

Soon enough, Rudolf’s _Wowo_ is replaced by an awful brute of the man. Tod is no stranger to humanity’s cruelty, and yet, he cannot seem to stomach the treatment little Rudolf is subject to at the hands of Count Gondrecourt. Tod finds himself revolted by the sight of the child’s nursery turned, seemingly overnight, into barracks. He watches, gut twisting uncomfortably, as who he has come to think of as his prince, is raised per military regulation. He accompanies Rudolf on his snowy, predawn marches, lingering just on the edge of the lantern light, and becomes deeply bitter when the prince begins to shy away from the cold of his touch. If not for Tod’s comforting presence being so frequent, the winter of his skin would have quick become a negative association. The child is awoken in the middle of the night by the firing of pistols inside his bedchambers, and finds himself screaming for Tod regardless of whether the shots are real, or the creation of some imagined night-terror. Tod comes quicker than is dignified for a person of his importance, gathers Rudolf in his arms, and despises Elisabeth with every fibre of his being. Tod had long ago decided he did not like the woman, but now, for abandoning such a sweet soul to the raucous abuse of the Count, the mere thought of her made his lip curl into a sneer.

-

Rudolf is not ready to have done so when he quite proudly presents to Der Tod a cat he has killed. Tod’s face warps into one of pity when the boy near immediately is sick at the sight and curls, sobbing hysterically, into his friend’s arms. They bury the creature in the gardens together, and Rudolf is later scolded for the mud on his pants. Tod accompanies Rudolf on his impromptu, forced hunting expeditions, and counsels him through shooting his first deer. Rudolf is a remarkable shot. The steadiness of his finger upon the trigger takes Tod’s stale, millennia-old breath away. The boy is inconsolable for days. Sisi insists to Franz Josef that her son is too young for Death. Tod smiles wryly to himself and goes to bid his charge a good night. Elisabeth shows a foreign interest in her son’s life and talks Franz Josef into firing Rudolf’s teacher.

-

The Crown Prince takes up an obsession with minerals, and begins to present Tod with one pebble every time he visits. Tod exchanges the pebble for an item of equal interest to the boy; a feather from one of his reapers, or a stone from a different part of the world, or even a tin toy of some variety. They play together outside in the dirt, Tod reads aloud to Rudolf when the prince stumbles over a word, they walk together in the forest and swim together in the stream and take naps together under trees. Tod does not neglect his duties as Death, but some days, he falls behind. Rudolf never ceases asking questions. He is particularly adept at learning languages. Tod is again and again pleasantly surprised by his young friend’s affinity for knowledge. He is happy to provide counsel, and they spend many hours speaking late into the night. Rudolf falls asleep clutching Tod’s pinky as he did when he was a young child, lips parted, head resting at the juncture of where Tod’s thigh meets his body, nestled up comfortably between Death’s legs. Tod spends the entire night smoothing down the feathery hairs at the nape of Rudolf’s neck. He likes to think his actions sooth any nightmares from the prince’s mind.

-

Rudolf presents to Tod a taxidermied raven, and his eyes visibly shine with pride when Tod tells him it is beautiful and he has done a fine job. The sewing is sloppy and the glass eyes are set wrong, too deeply, but Tod very much so appreciates the gesture. He runs a finger along its back, smoothing its feathers, and his heart sinks when he glances up to see Rudolf watching him hungrily. Rudolf has always been a miserable child, and Tod is aware of the light he brings to the boy’s life. Truthfully, he is the prince’s sole true companion and dearest friend. Tod visits less frequently after that, takes longer to come when called. He feels strangely guilty for it, but Rudolf is growing up. It is time Tod takes a step back and permits the boy to become a young man without his influence.

-

The little prince begins to write letters. He is obsessed with doing so, penning hundreds of missives a week. In his isolation, Rudolf writes endlessly. His mineral collection, amateur taxidermy, and books are all pushed aside. Tod finally comes when he is called, on Christmas eve, when it becomes clear that Rudolf is not going to be permitted to spend the next morning with his sister or parents, regardless of the pleads he has sent out. Rudolf tells him he is a horrible friend for not coming sooner, tells Tod that he is selfish and mean and vile, then ceases his pacing, settles onto the settee at Tod’s side, and fixes his eyes upon the column of Tod’s throat. Tod’s Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows, feeling like an insect under the prince’s gaze, and Rudolf’s cheeks catch aflame, hot with desire. Tod cannot help but imagine what it would feel like to have the prince’s lips upon his skin, burning kisses down his neck. This becomes a tradition Death himself is ashamed of. On Christmas morning, Rudolf half-heartedly trades a pebble for a feather. It is obvious he no longer desires such fickle things from Tod. Just before Tod leaves, the Crown Prince grips at his elbow and lurches up to peck Tod on the corner of the mouth, out of the blue. Tod can only just hide the utter want it dredges up within him. Rudolf is a sad thing, but still, as much as Tod craves his presence at his side for the remainder of eternity, it is not his time. Tod runs a cool hand through Rudolf’s hair, returns the kiss to the plane of Rudolf’s high cheek, and returns to his own realm.

-

Franz Josef accompanies Rudolf on a hunting expedition. The Crown Prince’s gun jams after he has aggravated a bear. Tod is there to tear the animal apart by the jaws, moving too quickly and with far too much force to pass as human. Rudolf disassembles and repairs his rifle, then blows the beast’s head to bits, although it already lies dead before them. Tod’s hands shake as he rinses them clean in a nearby stream. He is worried that Rudolf fears him, but when he rises and turns, Rudolf’s eyes are dark, pupils blown wide as he thanks him, quietly, and nuzzles the tip of his nose briefly under Tod’s jaw. The rolling warmth of Rudolf’s breath on his skin makes Tod quiver again, and he barely murmurs a “you are welcome” before he crosses back to his own realm. The Crown Prince confirms he wants Tod as much as Tod wants him.

-

This game continues for years. As Rudolf grows into a young man, Tod finds himself more and more infatuated with the prince than he has been with any human before. There have, of course, been others he has taken specific interest in, but none so deeply as Rudolf. He provides continuous support and counsel for the Crown Prince, and although the time lengthens between their meetings, he always has an eye on Rudolf. The Prince keeps a pair of ravens as pets. They whisper things to Tod if he asks nicely enough. They tell him of Rudolf’s political exploits, of his failed interpersonal relationships, of the effects of Konnigratz, of the hysterical flight to Hungary, of the Prince’s successes in modernizing the nation and how he builds the empire out from beneath Franz Josef’s feet. He presides over electrifying one city, introduces an underground tube system, develops Hungary’s industry and technology and infrastructure. Rudolf is forward-thinking and very clever. He is the ideal candidate to lead Hungary into the twentieth century. Tod is immensely proud and continuously impressed by Rudolf’s competence; something that has gone wholly unrecognized by the young man’s parents. He comes when he is called, but Rudolf has become very busy, and Tod finds himself needed less and less. Rudolf yearns less frequently for the final act that he has always chased. Death pretends that this disconnect does not make his chest feel tight.

-

Somewhere it has gotten lost that Der Tod’s interest in Rudolf stems from his immense hatred of Elisabeth. In spite of the Crown Prince’s success, he is still not good enough for that woman or her husband. Rudolf decides that he will always need Tod. Their first proper kiss comes gently, the evening quiet, Rudolf smoking out on the balcony. Their conversation has been long and involved. The prince stubs his cigarette out, turns to look at Death, and leans up into his personal space. The touch of their lips is like fire, and Tod produces a soft noise. Rudolf winds a hand into Tod’s hair and pulls him closer, his free hand sliding down Tod’s back to rest at his waist. Tod’s cool hands settle, soft, at Rudolf’s hips. Suddenly, their little game has come to an end, and something new has blossomed. When Tod pulls away so Rudolf may draw a shuddery breath, he does not hide his smile when Rudolf tells him he is both the reason he lives and why he strives so earnestly towards Death.

-

The standards are impossible for Rudolf to meet. His education features thirteen hour days under the tutelage of fifty or so separate persons. He learns ten languages. He becomes extremely proficient in everything he sets out to accomplish—politics, war, knowledge. Franz Josef keeps him suppressed. Tod thinks the Kaiser is afraid of the capabilities of his own son. Rudolf blames God, then develops a stubbornly agnostic perspective. Der Tod is the only omniscient hand he requires in his life, he states, as he refocuses his attentions on the ornithology that so fascinated him in his youth. He shoots five eagles and presents three to Tod, one to the Vienna National Museum, and another, to his own mantelpiece. His interest in taxidermy and minerals grows. Despite his bizarre mentalities and continuous sicknesses, he is remarkable. Tod loves him for these things. He is a companion to Rudolf, comes obediently whenever he is required, spends the vast majority of his time thinking of the Crown Prince, and in spite of the desire to take the prince and make him his own, Tod refrains. When they kiss, he is hyper-vigilant so as not to harm Rudolf in any way. They kiss very often. Tod is always there when Rudolf wants him to be.

-

Der Tod is jealous to the point it makes his head reel when he learns that Rudolf is to marry Stephanie. She is not like the other sad attempts at romance the prince has suffered through. On the eve of his wedding night, Rudolf calls Tod to his bedchambers, crowds him against his desk, and kisses him as though he were a drowning man gulping air. Tod smooths his hands through Rudolf’s hair, licks the sweet of the alcohol off his kiss-swollen lower lip, and spreads his legs compliantly. The Crown Prince fucks Death over his desk, then in his soon to be wedding-bed, and then once more in the bed. He goes to sleep, sober and crying gently against Tod’s chest. The wedding is a miserable affair. The bride has ordered special French high heels and thusly stands one inch taller than her groom. Tod forces himself to watch. His chest hurts. Rudolf meets his gaze when he speaks his wedding vows. Tod is still in love with the Crown Prince.

-

Tod refuses to come the first time Rudolf calls him to assist in his lovemaking to Stephanie. However, he cannot ignore the prince for long, and so, he comes, and stands, dutifully, like a dog, at the foot of his master’s bed, making eye contact with Rudolf so the prince may perform properly. Stephanie does not notice her husband’s lack of interest in her. Tod feels sick. Shortly after Stephanie retires to her own suite, Tod lets Rudolf fuck him too. It takes two years of this routine before Stephanie becomes pregnant. Tod could not care less for Erzsi. He could not care less for Elisabeth. He has attentions only for Rudolf. He tries to convince himself that Rudolf is a passing fancy. He fails.

-

Tod begins to avoid Rudolf. The crushing want for the Crown Prince that has built itself under his breastbone is too much. Rudolf joins a society that advocates for the preservation of birds.

-

Rudolf begins to take mistresses. He becomes addicted to opium, to cigarettes, to alcohol. The political jungle that the Crown Prince has lost himself within becomes thicker and more dangerous. Everything seems to be going wrong for Rudolf. He seems to again be a frightened child. He lashes out, imbibing and indulging more frequently than ever. Nothing improves in his life, and he finds solace in the pleasures of the world. He takes a new woman to bed nearly every evening. Tod masquerades as pretty girls, always blonde, always happy to roll over for the Crown Prince. He pretends it does not make him feel ill when he can only bear interact with Rudolf as one of these women.

-

Rudolf meets Mary. Tod does not come when called.

-

Rudolf attends a ball dressed in the uniform of the army of the Imperial Second Reich. Tod comes when he is called that night, to comfort the Crown Prince, who smashes a glass on the floor and wears himself out in a fit of rage. He calms, shoulders heaving, eyes wide like a cornered beast, and tells Tod that he is not allowed to leave him. Tod comes to his side, picks the glass shards from his palms, laps gently at the blood of his wounds with his cool tongue, and nods. From this moment on, Tod begins to come again. Rudolf begs him to take him away, withdraws from Mary, suffers terribly under political and emotional strain. Tod is there. Their closeness resumes. They despise Stephanie, Elisabeth, Franz Josef, and the entire empire together. Mary becomes a friend to Rudolf. Tod despises her alone. The want for the Crown Prince is as heavy as ever in Tod’s mind.

-

Mayerling occurs quietly. Mary is dead before Tod realizes what is happening. He is immediately at Rudolf’s side. Death gives Rudolf a shoulder massage as Rudolf writes his suicide note. He joins Rudolf in bed, then drinks a celebratory toast with him, then stands before him, asking gently if Rudolf is absolutely sure. Rudolf murmurs that he is prepared to greet Death as an old friend, a smirk curling the edge of his mouth, then catches Tod’s face in his hands and brings him close for a kiss. They stand entwined in the bedchambers of Rudolf’s hunting lodge, touches tender, kisses soft and long and sweet. Rudolf breathes out that he is ready, please, and Tod kisses him with further intent. The Crown Prince’s body drops like a one of his favored stones, and Tod fires one round at point blank under its jaw, then curls the pistol into its hand. Rudolf makes a disgusted, but intrigued noise from somewhere behind him. Der Tod smiles.


End file.
